It is the tragedy of the world that no one knows what he doesn't know.
Joyce Cary
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Hello Kate
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If you don't feel my pain don't laugh at it.
Among the most complicated aspects of human life are the emotions. Who can explain where they come from, how they act and react and what they do to us? We may enjoy a good farce where we see a man slip on a banana peal and fall on his butt. Or we may enjoy watching the Three Stooges beat each other up. Because we know in those cases the pain isn't real. But some people laugh at real pain, a beggar stumbling down the street, a woman wailing uncontrollably over the death of a child, the antics of a one legged pigeon. The reasons why those things may seem funny are the grotesque qualities and the fact that you can't feel the suffering.
There is a large category of things that can be called emotions but they are all some form of discord in the system and they all affect us in different ways. Some people are seemingly insensitive to their feelings while others are overly sensitive. There are other result characteristics that come into being, sympathy, empathy, compassion or the lack thereof. Since emotions are not seen except in effects a man may be suffering a huge heart ache or intense fear and we wouldn't know it from looking at him unless we could read the signs.
The best position for someone to take is to be aware that the other person has feelings and they should be respected if we don't want to stir up a lot of negatives.
DB - Vagabond Journeys
Never Give Up
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2 comments:
Some people prefer to suffer in silence. The situation may be too painful to talk about, they might feel it is too embarassing to discuss with others, or they simply do not know what to do. I remember reading once that a person cannot feel real empathy towards another person unless they are familiar (as having gone through it themselves) with the situation or emotion that the other person is going through and can recognize it within themselves. So do not say "I know what you are going through" if you have not been through it yourself, because you will have no clue what the other is going through and you will not sound genuine.
I always like to think of putting myself in another's shoes.
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