April 13, 2013
Enlightened people seldom or never posses a sense of responsibility.
(George Orwell)
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Hello Lora
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I have been noting how often in my youth and even into adulthood I have given over to some authority my right to choose for myself. I remember back to advice given from people I should not have believed, standards of behavior which have since fallen victim to progressive thinking, moral standards that were proscriptive and based on irrational ideas, fantasies about life and my place in it.
The smarter I get, ok, the older I get, let's leave "smart" for now,
the less respectful I get for the ideas that have been dangling in front of me for decades. I could go into tales of the wrong school, the wrong mate, the wrong moves, the wrong professional choices and the wrong remarks to illustrate the troubled life I've had because of being influenced by someone or something I should have ignored.
A psychologist could probably describe to me a pattern of behavior that has caused me the troubles I've had. But if he did he would only be telling me something I have already learned. And it's the danger of repetition. If you are sure you are doing the right thing and you fail, and if you try it again and you fail again, don't try it again just because some standard of behavior is written on your mental wall. Patterns can be dangerous things. That's why most snakes wear them.
"Have a nice day" the checkout girl said as she handed me my bag of groceries. I did not want to insult her. I thanked her and said "But it's raining out there and it's cold." I only wanted to suggest a retreat from the automaton mind set she has been talked into.
Somewhere way back I learned to question things, almost everything. I questioned my motives, my actions, my responses, my attitudes, my beliefs and my ideas. I tried to rub everything against the touchstone of my own sense of honesty. There were many times in the past I might say something I didn't really mean. Now if someone says "How are you?" if I'm not feeling fine I don't answer. Because if they really want to know they will get a catalogue of what's wrong with me. I would rather say nothing and appear rude.
Cliched ideas and cliched words grow like dandelions in our heads. They steal away original thinking and fill up the spaces where enlightened deeds may grow. I try to flee from those cliches. I do not need to be responsible for thinking, saying or doing anything because that is the so-called normal way of it.
We all start off average, but there is no reason we have to stay that way.
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Dana Bate
Vagabond Journeys
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Never give up.
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