Asocial Skills

We dare not trust our wit for making our home pleasant to our friend, so we buy ice cream

Emerson
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I learned many things growing up but one thing I never learned was how to be comfortable in the presence of strangers. Even though I always felt comfortable and at home on the stage, I'm always uncomfortable when I am invited to someone's house. I'm a terrible guest. I overcompensate for being uncomfortable by doing things that seem rude and presumptuous or else I sit in a corner and just look, without entering into any conversations.

I always want people to come and visit me, especially now that I live so much alone. They rarely do, but I'm always embarrassed at how my place looks and smells. There will probably still be some dishes in the sink, something around that needs cleaning and a pile of chaos somewhere. People come to see me, if they do, not to look at my apartment. I always forget that.

I guess in some ways it's a mark of vagabondism. Intelligent adults are supposed to have social skills, to know how to say the right thing, do the right think and dress in an appropriate manner. I never learned any of those things. Maybe those graces come from being in a family and learning how to deal with people on a regular basis, I don't know. I didn't have such a family.

Those skills may also come from examples, learning from those around you how to behave. Those around me had the same embarrassing lack of finesse I did, so I didn't learn anything polite and gracious from them. I still leave my spoon in the cup and not on the saucer.

And now, the tail may still be wagging and I can still do roll over and sit, but this old dog is probably not going to gain any new tricks. I'd rather have a nap. If you come to visit me, (please do, someday), you'll have to bring your own ice cream.

DB - The Vagabond
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APRIL FOOLERY

Weekend Contest
This contest is open for the next 3 days.

APRIL FOOLERY
Choose as many numbers as you want and fill in the blanks
Winners will be posted on the evening of April 4.
The decisions of the nasty biased judge are final. Prizes will awarded on the basis of originality and whatever makes me laugh.

3 ENTRIES SO FAR

On the first day of April my true love gave to me
12______
11______
10______
9_______
8_______
7_______
6_______
5_______
4_______
3_______
2_______
and_______

Good luck
DB
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