Flee those degrees of knowledge that necessarily increase your woes.
Giordano Bruno
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Hello Sue
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I thought about finding a journey to write about that would be appropriate for All Fools Day. I thought I could come up with something humorous that would be a relief from some of the ponderous stuff I've been writing lately. But instead I'm writing about something wryly funny, perhaps, but of serious foolery.
This evening I had a conversation with my friend Marty, a New York City sidewalk philosopher and concrete psychologist of the highest order. He told about a few of the women at his job who come to work with huge heavy bags of things they never use and are of no importance, but they would feel lost and naked without them. I've known other people like that. It's like a madness of possessions. One is possessed by one's possessions.
Surely I'm not like that. Am I?
I was complaining to Marty about how I can't seem to shake the doubts, fears, suspicions and painful memories of my recent experiences, and of why, even though I know I must, I can't make them unimportant to me.
That's when he told me about the ladies with the bags. Thanks to Marty I realized that along with my books, clothes, papers, paintings, bits of furniture and other things I had also brought along in a heavy bag all the memories, and reminders of the terrible time I had and was now stuffing into it the doubts and suspicions of my present life. I can't let go of all the negative feelings because I keep referring back to what is in the bag. And the reason I do that is because the bag is all I have.
Now some of my other friends like Arlene, Pacifica, Rose, Val and others have been urging me to get out, meet other people, go to the church near by and find other things to do with nice, good people. So I guess I've been putting it off because I had to take care of what's in the bag.
But none of those things matter. I brought a lot of books with me, some I won't ever read, they will go to the library. It doesn't matter what is going on in my old apartment building, if the dope is still selling dope there and who is buying it. It doesn't matter what my false and former friend is doing or where she's doing it. It doesn't matter that I'm not being driven around these days by her and have to walk places It doesn't matter what my next door neighbors are like or what they do, so I don't have to keep an eye or an ear on them. It doesn't matter what cars are parked in the parking lot so I don't have to keep looking out the window. I doesn't matter what happened or didn't happen, what was said or not said, what I knew or didn't know. None of it is important. It is all just junk in the heavy bag I lugged with me when I moved. And I've been caring about it because it was all I had. The only reason it was important to me was that I had nothing else.
Marty's advice: Take the bag out to the edge of a steep cliff and give it a boot. And anyone who is still toting around a big bag full of useless thoughts, impressions, emotions and memories, I suggest you follow Marty's advice.
Thank you Marty. Love to you.
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DB - Vagabond Journeys
Never Give Up
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5 comments:
If I recall correctly, Bruno composed and promulgated his "Infinite Worlds Theory", for which he was burned at the stake. So I doubt he always took his own advice, but a tough and inspirational thinker. You too! Good post.
Your friend Marty gave you some good advice. You have many attributes, gifts and good qualities and none of them will fit into a bag. Those stay with you at all times. But obviously neither you nor Marty know much about women. Those big bags the ladies carry around are necessary for survival. They contain a lot of things that could be used in a pinch, maybe a change of clothing, a pair of shoes, make up, sewing kit, cell phone, journal, leftover lunches, kid's toys and baby stuff, books, maybe a wallet, medications, personal supplies, perfume, toothbrush and maybe even sexy lingerie. They might appear useless to men, but I can assure you that some women cannot survive without those big bags. Bite your tongue about that particular ladies' accessory or you risk being smacked by one.
OH THANK YOU, Marty,
You got through to Dana when no one else could.
Dana, I am glad you finally heard someone. I think everyone was saying the same thing, and I knew you were not ready to hear it. Marty certainly has a way with words, I can see why you two are friends.
And Hi back at ya.
Sue
Thank you to Marty for your help in getting DB to let the bag go...he's made not only your day better DB but, all of us who care about you feel good knowing that you'llnowhopefully, be looking at each new day in a more positive manner.
Despite your subsequent dream, I think Marty is right. Although you may not be able to get entirely rid of that "bag," you can diminish the contents' power over you by replacing some of those things with new people and new experiences. As I have written to you previously, I think you are giving certain people and certain situations too much power over you. It is up to you to take it back.
Hugs, Beth
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