Monday, April 16, 2012

In The Morning

Live your life as though there is great joy to be experienced.

Meladee McCarty
**********************
Hello Linda
**********************
In the Sophocles play "Oedipus the King" Jocasta, Oedipus' wife and mother has a speech in which she states that she has come to that point in life where there can be no more joy, implying that it is a point we will all inevitably reach. The first time I heard that speech I had a strong negative reaction to it. A hopelessly joyless life may be what she looks forward to considering the tragedy that has unfolded before her. But that certainly doesn't need to mean the permanent loss of joy for all of us.

There is no joy in my life currently. It was taken from me in early February by an unfortunate set of discoveries and realizations just as Jocasta faced in her life. Though hers were much more tragic than mine the resultant disappearance of joy was the same. To find out as Jocasta did and as I did that we were living in a lie, living with a lie, for years and not knowing it is an agony of unspeakable depth.

Since that time I have been repositioning myself, mentally, emotionally and physically to rediscover the joy I had. Though I can sympathize with her I don't have the same attitude Jocasta had. I believe the joy is in me and I will experience it again.

There are many things that can deprive someone of their joy. Fear and pain are two big ones. In fact those two horros are major villains in everyone's life. And they must be fought against with vigor and persistence every day. The joy of standing on the summit of the mountain can only be attained by the dangerous struggle to climb it.

I go back to the metaphor of the radio that only plays two stations. One is blaring all the fearful thoughts that trouble me and cause me pain, and the other has the soothing voice of reason, harmony and truth. But the ornery dial keeps switching back to the negative station and if I'm not careful I find myself listening to it. One station speaks of loss, loss of joy, loss of everything, the fear of never again having the life you had. The other station speaks of life, future, freedom. joy. And that's the doctrine I accept.

The struggle against fear and loss is harder than I thought it would be but I've won enough battles to know I will win the fight, and that will be a joyous day.

Dana Bate - Vagabond
Never give up.
***********************

9 comments:

pacifica62 said...

Depending on circumstances or one's state of mind, depression, anxiety and mental illness, could make it virtually impossible to find joy or even to hang on to it.I might even go as far as to say that likely there are more people joy eludes than there are people who live it and celebrate it. It is a precious commodity these days.

Arlene (AJ) said...

You'll get thru this DB, just take it one day at a time and keep a positive attitude that you are in a better and safer place than you were before....don't allow yourself to dwell on the past, it's over...today is a new day.

Arlene (AJ) said...

You'll get thru this DB, just take it one day at a time and keep a positive attitude that you are in a better and safer place than you were before....don't allow yourself to dwell on the past, it's over...today is a new day.

Rubye Jack said...

Hello DB.

I thought joy was a pretty strong word until just now. Actually I had to look it up and found it really isn't all my mind had it cracked up to be. It seems it is not much more than happiness and happiness is something that can most always be found again and if not, there's always serenity and contentment.

I really like your radio metaphor as it makes room for luck. For me getting happy again had a lot to do with patience.

MEM said...

I am going through second hand PTSD as I care for my beloved who has PTSD. At times it is all I can do to get out of bed. G_D brought joy into our lives through a little four-legged miracle named Montaque. And I know your joy will bubble up one day soon too.
Love dear friend
Laini

MEM said...

I am going through second hand PTSD as I care for my beloved who has PTSD. At times it is all I can do to get out of bed. G_D brought joy into our lives through a little four-legged miracle named Montaque. And I know your joy will bubble up one day soon too.
Love dear friend
Laini

MEM said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
MEM said...

I am going through second hand PTSD as I care for my beloved who has PTSD. At times it is all I can do to get out of bed. G_D brought joy into our lives through a little four-legged miracle named Montaque. And I know your joy will bubble up one day soon too.
Love dear friend
Laini

Bucko (a.k.a., Ken) said...

One thing we can always control is our attitude, and attitude is what gives us the ability to have joy and happiness.