Thursday, October 13, 2011

Watch Your Mouth

Let no one be willing to speak ill of the absent.

Sextus Propertius
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Hello Geo
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I was in rehearsal for a play and during a break I walked into the Green Room (the actor's lounge). Just as I did one of the actors was talking about someone and he instantly stopped in mid sentence. There were some blushing faces, one person became immediately involved in a magazine, the fellow who had been talking was staring at the floor sheepishly.

I sat down and said "So, I walked into a conversation about myself and now everyone here is embarrassed except for me." There was silence. Then I said "I'm flattered that you think I'm important enough to gossip about." More silence, so I changed the subject and got people talking again.

Over the years I worked with two radio announcers who delighted in making fun of other people. They would tell the most damaging and derogatory jokes about someone or other which they would never repeat to that person's face. Their comments were very funny and people laughed. I wondered if those people would laugh if the joke was about them.

I find that kind of humor despicable. It's degrading, cruel, malignant and ignorant. It's the sort of humor that's rampant on some TV talk shows these days, which is why I won't watch them.

I can laugh at myself, but I don't need to be told what's funny about me, unless it's from a good friend who does it with love and respect. And if someone makes jokes about me behind my back he's not a friend, no matter how friendly he may appear to my face.

One day in New Hampshire a fellow got invited into my home for a day, asked me all sorts of questions about me and my life, seemed to be very impressed and interested and we genuinely had a good time together, I thought. Then I heard from someone else that he went back to the city and was spreading all kinds of rumors about me by twisting around the things I told him. He thinks I have forgotten him and his name. I haven't.

It's a terrible thing to be the victim of a laughing gossiper. It's even worse if you find yourself being one, just to get the laughs.

Those two announcers both got fired because they made the wrong joke, about the wrong person, at the wrong time. But, alas, they took the mouths they couldn't watch with them.

DB - The Vagabond
Never Give Up
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AUTUMN QUESTION

What event over the past year changed your life, a lot or a little?

Only 4 answers so far.

dbdacoba@aol.com

I await your answers.
DB
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5 comments:

Jon said...

The people with the biggest, most gossipy mouths can dish it out but they usually can't take it.
I've never liked people who laugh at the expense of others.

Valerie said...

What a golden quote! When someone is gossiping to me, I usually stop them in their tracks and tell them I am not interested in hearing what they have to say. Then I take note of who is talking and make sure I don't tell them anything personal.

How sad that someone has to find this a form of entertainment. Great post!

Arlene (AJ) said...

Why is it that the big mouths who talk about others can never realize that they are the ones who are cruel big mouths who go out of their way to hurt other people. Their days are coming hopefully to see how ugly mouth they are.

Arlene (AJ) said...

Why is it that the big mouths who talk about others can never realize that they are the ones who are cruel big mouths who go out of their way to hurt other people. Their days are coming hopefully to see how ugly mouth they are.

Ken Riches said...

I learned a long time ago that personal directed humor is a non-starter.