We love those who know the worst of us and don't turn their faces away.
I think there ought to be a manifesto connected with every friendship. Not a catalogue of things you expect from a friend but an unwritten document, based upon as much self knowledge as you have and can admit to yourself, that states "this is who I am and if you are my friend you will accept me as who I am and I will do the same for you." Another part of that manifesto should read "I may not be who you think I am and you may not be who I think you are, but we can both learn more about each other."
I have lost friends over the years and it always confuses me when I see them depart from me. There is never a reason given, a real reason, but it was likely to be something selfish on their part. They didn't get from me what they thought I would give or they got tired of pretending to be my friend. Maybe the so-called friendship was based on some shared interest that has faded. Whatever the reason I think friendship should be based on love that rides over the circumstances and keeps two people attached by an invisible thread as strong as a steel cable.
This I learned from my own experience. I think about people I once knew that I loved and admired. They were friends of mine and yet they aren't in my life any more. Why not? I know one very good reason. I tried to be the person they thought I was and wanted to be and I failed. Another good reason is that they became not the people I thought they were. The only time I actively broke off a friendship it was with a clear explanation of that person's belligerence and malignancy toward me. An unexpected result of my having the wrong opinion of them.
I believe it is the network of friendship that keeps civilization together. That net should never be broken and it can't be if friends don't turn on or away from each other.
I thought yesterday of starting a new journal labeled "Where are you?" and listing all the people I used to know and liked who have disappeared. I tried to locate a few on Facebook to no success. But I will bet some of them might still be close friends if the pieces could be picked up and joined again.
I don't want to lose friends by being who I am. But if it must be then it must be. I'm not going to change who I am to fit someone else's glove and I don't want anyone else to do that for me. We can love and accept each other for who we are, wrinkles and all, if we try. You got a problem with that?
DB - The Vagabond
(This is not a contest.)
Who are the 2 (two) most important people alive today? Why?
Only 5 responses so far.